Pain

I was alone in the woods. Looking for things to eat. Wondering about my life. Owh god! Help me. I was so deep in my thought.  How can I live here? I whisper in my heart. Tears rolling down. What a pain. What I expected to have a journey with ease can come to me after I left my loved ones, was just a dreadful fantasy. That had slaughter my future and their future. What a shame. A man ran away. Coward. Fool. I screamed, and it was a mistake.Then things becomes blurry. I can see a thing. Bright. I can hear its sound. Roaring. I can see its moving towards me. I can feel i am falling and it is on me.Holding. I can feel its teeth inside my skin. But I don't feel any pain. I am closing my eyes and I hear a bang! I heard voices. I am smiling and my eyes closed.

* * * * *

I can feel the breeze of the ocean. I'm home.

"Father.. Mother.. Where are you?" I shouted.

"What is it son? Whats the tension?" father asked.

"Father.. owh.. I was missing you so much.. I cannot live without my parents." I said softly. Crying.

"What happened to you? You look like that you had a nightmare. What sort of nightmare? Haha." my father said with a laugh.

I hugged him and he hugged me back.

"Son, I will do anything ti change your life" he said while hugging me

"Father, I will do everything to change our life." I replied

Then father hold my arm and said

"Promise me you would not be a fisherman like me"

"Yes father, I promise" I answered emotionally.

He added 

"I you want to be a fisherman, be a better one. Haha." He laugh and carve a smile on my face.

"Why are looking at the ocean and Where is mother?"I asked, suddenly.

"I am going for work. Predicting the weather. Mother. She went to the store to buy some things. She asked me to go for work early and come back home early." He answered.

"Owh, is it.? So that means I can follow you today. Please dad. I am so boring. Please" I begged.

"Alright then." He answered with a smile.

* * * * *

I sat on the boat. Alone. I was looking at the ocean. Peaceful. Why god creates such a place? One of it, is for this reason. A place where thoughts can fly freely. A place where mind could rest. A place where our heart can sing. Freely. It was almost dark. Father is going back to the shore. He is with Uncle Limbok, A native and uncle Hasan, his best colleagues. I was in the cabin when suddenly Uncle Hasan summoned me. He told there is going to be a heavy storm moving towards us. He asked me to stay in the cabin until someone called me. I asked for father, Uncle Hasan tell me that my father in steering the boat. About 15 minutes after that, I could feel the boat was moving the way a boat should not move. It freaks me out. Then I heard someones shouting my name. I go straight to the voice. It Is father. He said, I am going to live but not them. He gave me a life jacket and said that i have to swim to shore and live to take care of mom. He hugged me and said

"I love you, I love your mother but what I want is for you to live and move on. Do not stop." 

He smiled and push me to the ocean. I can feel the pain. Leaving him there was not a good deed of me. I swim to make him happy then i heard a very loud bang! I turn to see. The boat explode with my father on it. I swim faster. This is his last wish. So no point to give up. I really end up at the shore. Some people helped me.  Then I opened my eyes I saw mom 's tears. Crying for me.

* * * * *

"What happend?" I asked

Mom is so exited to hear me. She called the doctor. Then she tell everything. I was attacked by a tiger in the woods when I tried to ran away from her when I almost failed in my exam. I went to sleep in the cave where my father always bring me five years ago.
 Father died last year due to an accident. What I just did was not my father's way to overcome problems. The pain of a failure is much-much lighter then the pain of a lost. That pain thought me how my mother would feel if I died. That pain give me a hope, not to give up. Thank you dad for showing me when to live and when to die.

THE END